If you’re currently on a sexual hiatus, don’t panic—your vagina isn’t about to sprout cobwebs or seal itself shut like some ancient vault. Forget the jokes about tumbleweeds rolling across your pelvic floor or needing mystical tools to reenter the land of intimacy. Those myths are just that: myths. Sure, your body might feel different after a stretch without sex, but most changes are simply from missing out on the physical perks that regular sexual activity can bring—not because you’re falling apart from the inside out.
There’s a difference between a lifetime of celibacy and just taking a break after previously being sexually active. (And yes, science does study celibate individuals—just look at the long-running Nun Study, which began in 1986 and tracks the health of hundreds of American nuns.) For those who’ve had sex before and then go through a dry spell, the effects are real, but far from alarming. It’s not about losing your “sexual edge”—just some subtle shifts in how your body responds.
Here’s a look at what can happen when you stop having sex for a while:
1. Does Your Vagina Actually Get “Tighter”? Not Quite.
Let’s clear this one up first: taking a break from sex won’t make you “tighten up.” That’s a tired old myth. The feeling of vaginal tightness doesn’t come from how many partners you’ve had, and skipping sex for a while definitely won’t reverse time or “re-virginize” you. Your hymen also doesn’t grow back—sorry, middle school bathroom rumors were way off.
That said, your vaginal tissues might need a little time to get back into the swing of things. If they’re not used to arousal or penetration, they may take a bit more coaxing the next time around—but trust that they’ll bounce back.
According to sexologist Dr. Jordin Wiggins, ND, founder of Health Over All Inc., extended sexual inactivity can lead to pelvic floor muscle weakening, also known as atrophy. “Strong pelvic floor muscles are key for maintaining bladder control and enhancing orgasm quality,” she explains. People with vaginas might also experience pelvic floor dysfunction, which can make sex uncomfortable or even painful. One example is vaginismus—a condition where the muscles involuntarily tighten during penetration.
If that sounds familiar, Dr. Wiggins recommends seeing a pelvic floor physiotherapist for guidance. You can also try tools like the Elvie trainer, which offers real-time feedback and helps ensure you’re doing pelvic exercises correctly.
2. Can You Develop Erectile Dysfunction?
This one might sting a bit if you have a penis and are taking a break from intercourse. Research, including a 2008 study from the American Journal of Medicine, suggests that abstinence can increase the chances of erectile dysfunction—especially in older folks. Basically, regular sexual activity seems to help keep erections going strong. Use it or lose it, as the saying goes. (And yes, there’s some evidence that regular ejaculations might lower the risk of prostate cancer—but hey, solo sessions count, too.)
3. Can It Affect Your Immune System?
Sexual activity appears to give your immune system a helpful boost. For folks with uteruses, this boost might even help the body get ready for pregnancy. The downside? Without regular sex, you miss out on these perks, possibly making you a tiny bit more vulnerable to common illnesses and infections. But don’t panic—Dr. Jodie Horton, MD, medical advisor at Love Wellness, reminds us there are plenty of other ways to support your immunity, like meditation, yoga, good sleep, a healthy diet, and staying active.
4. Can Your Libido Decrease?
Dr. Jordin Wiggins explains that sex isn’t like hunger—it’s more of a reward system. When you’re having good sex, you want more good sex. Skip it for a while, and you might find yourself perfectly okay without it. If you want to keep your drive alive during a dry spell, Dr. Horton suggests masturbation—it releases the same mood-boosting hormones without needing a partner.
5. Can It Affect Your Mental & Physical Health?
There’s a strong link between regular sex and stress relief, so going without might leave you more prone to anxiety and stress. A 2016 study in the Journal of Health and Social Behavior found that good sex seemed to protect women from heart problems later in life. If you used sex to unwind, its absence might leave you feeling more irritable. Dr. Wiggins advises finding other ways to boost your happy hormones—like exercise, socializing, or relaxing baths.
6. Can It Hurt Your Cardiovascular Health?
We know sex is great for heart health because it provides a hormonal and mild aerobic boost. What happens when you stop? Research is sparse, but if you replace sex with a solid workout routine, your heart might come out ahead. So, keep moving, and your ticker should thank you.
7. Can It Make It Hard to Get Wet?
Regular sex keeps your sexual organs “tuned up,” so a break might mean it takes a bit longer to get going down there. But Dr. Horton points out that decreased lubrication is more often linked to menopause-related estrogen changes than to sexual inactivity. So, if you’re not menopausal, this is likely less of a worry.
8. Can It Drastically Lower Your Risk of UTIs and STIs?
Here’s some silver lining: skipping sex reduces your risk of urinary tract infections, which often happen when bacteria get transferred during sex (especially from the anus). And obviously, no sex means no risk of most sexually transmitted infections. But keep in mind, some STIs can spread through nonsexual contact, so you’re not totally off the hook.
9. Can It Make You… Less Smart?
There’s an old myth that abstinence makes you smarter. Science actually says the opposite: sexual activity encourages neuron growth in the hippocampus, the part of the brain responsible for memory and learning. So if you’re suddenly smashing crossword puzzles, it’s probably boredom—not brain gains—that’s fueling your newfound smarts.
